P H E N I B U T   (the transformation of dylan)

darren, the housemate who had contacted me about two days before my birthday, drinks a lot. he took me to a bar, i guess i noticed the effects on my brain, and i started buying alcohol. the headaches are horrible, so i was thinking about another way to get me through my semi-charmed kind of social-life, and i thought about marijuana. i guess i was online and searching for an alternative, when i found nootropics...and one called phenibut. i read "nootropics" as "new tropics," i am aware the they are merely new psychotropics, but i just read it as "new tropics". "cocktail" came out when i was a freshman...i think i saw it at "the barn" theatre in frenchtown, nj, with brandon winn. phenibut is my new cocktail...when i mix it in liquid, it's the (noo)tropical drink melting in my hand...down in kokomo.

i told my counselor that i'd start with 250mg, as was directed by one place, but i took 750mg when i got them, because i'd been reading of people taking 1.5g and everything in between. the 750mg i took, it put me to sleep for 16 hours, so i took around 500 the next time. after a week, i am down to 250mg, and that little bit put me to sleep after a while. i wonder if my "easy slumber" is related to my brain-injury. ha. i should make a parody of phil collins' "easy lover" and call it "easy slumber".

i don't want to build a tolerance to it, and therefore i follow directions to take it only 2-3 times a week, and i guess it's getting me out of my shell. "i like my shell...if you get really close to maggie, you can hear the ocean". ha. anyway, it doesn't change me into a totally different person, no "mr. hyde"-like effects, though it does make me like whitney houston ("i just wanna get looo-oooo-ooose"), and that lyric plays a lot in my phenibut-affected brain.

i did order a boner-pill, Yohimbine hcl, and it's supposed to be okay (even good) to take with phenibut. i don't get boners as quickly (or as firm) as i used to. maybe this pill will make a difference. it's also supposed to be a good pill for working one's muscles.

there are a few handsome men at walmart, each of which i'd love to successfully hit on, but i don't hit on people. i don't even talk to people. i'm such a reclusive waste of space.

check out my site, www.jaggedlittledyl.com , unless you're there now